Do you intimidate others without realising it?
There is nothing wrong with having a strong personality, independence and determination but most of us would much rather be inspired than intimidated. Furthermore, the ability to inspire is an incredibly important skill for those in leadership roles.
Here are some signs you might intimidate others:
- You are very quick to speak out
You spend little time assessing people around you. You are often the first person to speak out. Perhaps you project a “know-it-all” attitude. People need to feel included, but if you cut people off mid-sentence, it might be time to pause before you speak. Let someone else speak first and share their thoughts. Learn to RESPOND rather than REACT. Being reactive can come across as intimidating.
- You are very “blunt”
You don’t beat around the bush. You go straight to the point. However, there is a difference between being blunt and being direct. If you want to get your point across honestly without intimidation, use “small talk” to soften your communication style. Small talk can have a big impact, especially in the workplace.
- You are opinionated
You seem to know EVERYTHING. You don’t let others share their ideas. Or they are too afraid to challenge your ideas. Perhaps you tend to enjoy proving yourself right. One of the most effective tools to improve your personal and professional development is self-awareness. It’s important to look within. Spend some time examining your interactions with others.
- People seem a little cautious or uncomfortable when you approach them
Have you felt like they are hesitant to get close to you? Do they tip-toe around you and avoid eye-contact? Be mindful of your body language, including facial expressions and tone of voice. Don’t invade other people’s personal space. Remember too, that personal space varies from culture to culture. Reading others is a skill that can be developed over time.
Most of us don’t deliberately try to intimidate others. Beneath tough exteriors, we often find softer and warmer individuals.
Do you think you might intimidate others?
If so, try to determine why people might feel intimidated by you. Try and see how your behaviours might look through other people’s eyes. Get a good understanding of your intimidating tendencies. Then, try and address those tendencies by making little changes. This doesn’t mean changing who you are, just adapting to your audience.
I guarantee, this will make a huge difference and helps you to build healthy connections with people – at work and at home.
I’d much rather be inspired than intimidated!!!
Eila Mikkonen
Counsellor, Coach & Mental Fitness Facilitator