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It’s Not My Fault!

Posted By Eila Mikkonen  
20/02/2021

 

As a mental health professional, I have worked with many people who struggle to take responsibility for themselves and their actions.

 

Over time, I have learned to recognise some common signs that indicate the individual is NOT willing to take responsibility for their actions:

 

  • Playing the victim “Poor me”

  • Blaming other people or external factors for misfortunes “It’s all your fault”

  • Making excuse after excuse “It's too hard” or "I'm too busy”

  • Denial “It didn’t cause any harm”

  • Minimising “It wasn’t that bad”

  • Lack of self-awareness “It’s not my fault”

  • Refusing to consider other perspectives "I know best" 

  • Continually hanging around toxic people and defending them  "Oh, they don't mean it"

  • Being pessimistic and bitter about life "It's so unfair"

 

But I don’t have the power, or need, to change or "fix" others. That's not my role.

 

What I can do is help people change their behaviour by supporting, inspiring and educating them.  Real, meaningful change can only come from within.

 

But that change requires some work and effort. Casual commitment won’t do the trick. People need to acknowledge the need for self-discipline, perseverance and – SISU.

 

Ultimately, we CAN change our habits and behaviour. It's not always easy, but it's always worth it!!!

 

So, are YOU taking full responsibility for your life?

 

Eila Mikkonen

Counsellor, Coach & Mental Fitness Facilitator